I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.