Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
