Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Randomize