I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
