what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Randomize
