like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Randomize
