it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
