...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Randomize
