my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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