The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
