How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
