the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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