How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
