You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
