I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Randomize