upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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