The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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