tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
