we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
