whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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