okay pat passed out under dana's car
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
