so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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