his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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