I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
