She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
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