My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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