i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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