how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
