I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Randomize
