Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
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