I wannas sexs uuuuu
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
