Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
