People with herpes should wear stickers.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
