No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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