I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
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we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
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I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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