he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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