I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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