then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize