I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize