I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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