Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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