I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
