My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
