Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
