A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize