It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Randomize
