I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize