shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
