I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
