If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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