I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
