Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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