the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
