dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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